The case in Bonnieville, Ky
This week No Stain No Problem got called out to another small town called Bonnieville, KY, pop 257. Going to all of these small towns is starting to get annoying. I still miss the big city. All of the lights and noises can not be found anywhere and I could go to any sporting event that I could imagine. The Hawks, Falcons and my favorite the Braves. Anyways let me get back to the clean up. The women murdered in this town was Martha Burtis. She was a professor at her college and the poor woman was strangled and shoved into a box. It is such a shame because she seemed like the nicest lady who most likely gave A’s to people in her class. At the murder scene we found Burtis’s cell phone and we found a video on it by someone named Black. The video was about a missing cat named Noir Cat. With my super detective mind I remembered that the initials on the bowl of the missing cat was NC. That when I knew that all of this cat evidence that keeps showing up has not been just a coincidence. Then I remembered that I had talked to some of the local cop’s and they said that some crazy lady had been calling about her missing cat. This is when it hit me that the murderer at these three crimes has been following the cat and killing anyone who has the cat. That is when the group decided that we could do some good and actually find out who this killer is, which I was going to suggest but Billy beat me too it. Man this got me jacked up. I was going to be like my old self again. Investigating murders, talking to witnesses, having sex with Blair (that happens anyways), finding a killer and most importantly putting him behind bars. I can not wait to start this investigation.
Discovery in Fredericksburg VA.
So, the mystery has been solved. Jim Groom, a man from the digital knowledge realm who worked side by side with one of his victims. He chased noir cat around the country killing whoever was the legal owner. I can not think of a reason for him doing so, except that he is mentally deranged. I can’t say I have not seen this before with my old police job in Atlanta. A deranged man who is so emotionally involved with something that he goes crazy and kills anything that is involved with it. In most cases it is an old girlfriend but I guess Groom was crazy enough for it to be a cat. I pray for the souls that were killed over a cat, yet I do admit it is a pretty awesome kitty. Not enough to go on a killing spree for though.
Anyway, Jim Groom is the murderer. We found out that a certain wrist band was worn by every single victim which said “4Life”, and with my incredible detective mind I remembered that “4Life” was the logo for DS106 which assured everyone that Groom was the murderer. I’m not saying that without me there is no way the group would have found out Groom was the killer, but I am saying that exactly.
After questioning Groom for a while we slowly got him to crack. We used the good cop bad cop routine except almost everyone was the bad cop. This technique eventually got him to admit that he was the murderer and that he abducted noir cat. I felt so proud for the rest of the agency. I felt like they could one day help me if we decided to become an investigation firm. They would all make a couple of good patawons.
The case in Harrison
Getting all of these calls that could be possible cases for me to solve is kind of a bummer. I see a whole bunch of evidence that I could use to find the killers at these murders, but I signed up for this job and boy let me tell you it pays a whole lot better than the Atlanta police department did. Anyways I wanted to elaborate on our most recent clean up. We get a call from a man who wants to remain anonymous (which about 95% of the time means that he/she is the killer) about a cleanup in Harrison, Idaho. It was such a small town that looked very peaceful. I hated it. I miss city life and coming to towns like these make me home sick. At least Blair is here to keep me from going crazy.
We arrived on the scene and the blood was everywhere but there was nobody to be found. Of course it is not my job to solve murders anymore so I stayed out of the room. My job was to go to the police department to make sure they were not wondering why we were there and to make sure there is not a missing persons file. Using my old badge I got past the front desk and snooped around the back room to see if there was anything about this case. I found nothing and then asked one of the officers about are group and he had no idea. This was a pretty slack force but I guess it makes since since it is such a small town. Maybe the next clean up there will be something more interesting for me to do. I returned to the group when Blair handed me black cat hair. I looked at it for a bit but didn’t care any to look into it.
The case in Tecolotito
So our most recent cleanup is in Tecolotito, NM, pop 232, which I don’t know why, but all of our cases seem to be in very small towns. Makes me want to go back to my old profession as a cop in Atlanta. I always found that whenever a murder went unsolved we would always look into murders that happened in small towns to try and link the two crimes. I don’t know why some murders think they are safe in these small towns to keep on killing, but they always get caught. Anyways we ended up finding 13 cat bowls at this clean up, but there was only 12 cats. I don’t really understand this but there was in fact cat fur in our last cleanup. The detective in me would say that this could be a link, but my new job is just to stay quiet, so I guess this may just be a coincidence.
Stella and I had to work together to make sure no one found out about why there was a water leak in the apartment. Apparently the water messed up the entire apartment complex and people are beginning to ask questions. I went to the local police department to inform them that the lawyer had moved away. Stella also put out a notice that the apartment is up for sale, of course this won’t be until Jack can repair most of the damage.
I am not sure what to do about this cat coincidence at both scenes, but I guess if we keep getting calls from this anonymous person this cat case will keep showing up. I guess I don’t really care but it would be satisfying to bring down one more murderer.
My first daily create this week was a happy birthday wish to Maggie Black. I created this using a template from word and added a noir cat to make this more ds106.
My second daily create was to take a photo of umbrella art. I got the idea that umbrellas are used to block sunlight sometimes and so do blinds so I thought it was clever for an umbrella to take over the blinds job.
I uploaded these photos to flickr and embedded them into this post.
So do you want to know what goes on at the No Stain No Problem? Well here is one days todo list in which is a pretty normal day. Although I can not say legally that any of this actually happened but let me say that we will not be having a pesky neighbor problem anymore.
This assignment is worth two stars from the visual assignment bank and I made it using my sticky note feature on my computer. Of course I know all my fellow co-workers but if you want to see more about our bios visit http://kelseyroach17.wix.com/no-stain-no-problem#!staff/c1atl
Watch out! If you purchase blood stain remover from any other company except for No Stain No Problem your eyes will fall out, your toes will shrivel into your body, then your head will explode into a million pieces. So I will leave it up to you, either buy an unnamed product that will make your head explode or buy Blood Be Gone and get rid of the bloody mess on your carpet fast and easy.
p.s. I am not saying this just because I work for No Stain No Problem, which sells Blood Be Gone.
I made this poster with postermywall.com and found a cool template for a warning poster. I thought the flames were a good backgroud becausue they would catch your eye along with the the big warning text that will bring you in to read the small text.
For this web assignment I created a quiz on uquiz.com. This quiz is all about finding out who you are most related to on the show I was apart of on Noir Not the Father. The coolest person to get would be Micheal Bretton but there are a couple other good choices out there. Using uquiz.com was actually very easy and I would recommend it instead of the other site that the assignment suggests. It was very easily laid out and I did not run into any confusing spots.
For my first assignment this week I made my resume for three stars. I used Microsoft word and I got to tell you it is damn hard to make a resume when you have been working for the same organization for over 30 years. The only experience I have is with the Atlanta police department and I have never had to apply to another job before. I actually do not even remember how to make a proper resume because I honestly thought I would never need to again. Is it okay to talk about your girlfriend in your resume? Eh whatever Blair is my sugar momma (as of now) so she deserves to be in it.
Below is a link to get to my resume but below that is an embedded link from flickr if the main link does not work. Let me know what you think!
Micheal Bretton resume